One of the first questions couples ask me when we start building their timeline is: “Should we do a first look?”
It’s a big decision — one that can shape the flow, emotion, and rhythm of your entire day. As a Toledo wedding photographer who’s seen hundreds of weddings with and without first looks, I promise there’s no “wrong” choice. It’s all about what fits you as a couple.
Let’s talk through both options so you can make the best decision for your wedding day.
What is a First Look?
A first look is a private moment between you and your partner before the ceremony — usually captured by your photographer from a distance. It’s when you see each other for the first time on your wedding day, away from the crowd, with space to breathe and take it all in.
Most couples choose to do a first look because it gives them time together before the whirlwind begins. It can also help calm nerves, reduce anxiety, and create one of the most emotional, authentic photo moments of the day.
The Benefits of Doing a First Look
1. You get to be present with each other.
There’s something magical about that quiet, private moment before the ceremony — no eyes on you, no distractions. Just the two of you, soaking it all in.
2. You’ll have more time for photos.
Doing portraits, wedding party photos, and sometimes even family photos before the ceremony means you can head straight to cocktail hour afterward.
3. Your timeline runs smoother.
When portraits are already done, you won’t feel rushed or squeezed for light later in the day. Especially for fall or winter weddings when the sun sets early, a first look keeps everything relaxed.
4. You’ll enjoy more of your celebration.
This is a big one! With a first look, you can join cocktail hour, greet guests, and start celebrating sooner — without sacrificing portraits.
The Case for Skipping a First Look
Of course, many couples still choose the traditional route — waiting until the ceremony for that first emotional moment. And it’s absolutely beautiful.
1. You love the idea of the “aisle reveal.”
That moment when you lock eyes walking down the aisle? It’s cinematic, emotional, and unforgettable.
2. You want to preserve tradition.
For some couples (or families), waiting until the ceremony just feels right. If you’ve dreamed about that moment since childhood, honor it.
3. You value anticipation.
There’s something deeply romantic about building that excitement and finally seeing each other surrounded by loved ones.
How it Affects Your Timeline
This is where most couples don’t realize how big an impact the decision makes.
With a first look:
- You’ll start photos earlier in the day (often 1–2 hours before the ceremony).
- Most portraits are finished before the ceremony.
- You can enjoy the cocktail hour without rushing.
Without a first look:
- You’ll need a longer cocktail hour or ample photo time between the ceremony and reception (ideally 90 minutes).
- You’ll likely do family and wedding party photos right after the ceremony.
- Sunset portraits happen after dinner (still gorgeous, just different energy).
Neither option is wrong — they just create a different flow.
Bonus: First Look Alternatives
If you love the idea of a private moment but don’t want to see each other before the ceremony, try one of these sweet alternatives:
- First touch: Hold hands around a corner or doorframe while exchanging words or gifts.
- Private vow exchange: Read personal vows before the ceremony without the full first look reveal.
- Father/daughter or parent first look: These are always emotional and meaningful moments to include.
Photographer’s Perspective
From my experience, couples who do a first look tend to feel more relaxed and grounded on their wedding day — but that doesn’t mean it’s the right fit for everyone.
The most important thing is that your decision feels authentic to you both. I help every couple build a timeline that fits their comfort level, lighting needs, and the story they want to tell.
Final Thoughts
Whether you decide to have a first look or wait for the ceremony, it will be perfect because it’s yours.
My best advice? Talk it through with your photographer and planner. Think about what matters most — a private emotional moment, or the build-up of anticipation before you walk down the aisle. There’s beauty in both.
If you’d like help mapping out what your wedding day timeline might look like with or without a first look, check out my How to Plan a Wedding in Toledo, Ohio guide for example timelines and local planning tips.
